Since the doctor informed me that you have a sign of serious asthma. My sleep always link to your breathing rate and the sound of your respiration. Each night laying next to you when you were sleeping deeply, I always hold you tight, look at your chest just to check your breathing rate. I woke up so many times during the night to saw myself putting my ear against your back to listen to the sound of your breath just for sure there are no strange sound, only be able to sigh with relief when knowing for sure you were sleeping well.
Knowing that there are many people who have experienced asthma at a young age, and still grow up healthy like any normal person, still swimming, still playing sports, nothing would stop them. The information is really worth and encouraging for me and you, baby! I believe my Chou will be unyielding to crush any obstacles of this disease.
Knowing this, and encouraging myself a lot, but I still sometimes seeing me to become weak and be overcome by fear. Whenever seeing you were stuffy, wheezed, I immediately forgot all knowledge that I just have been learnt and turned into panic-stricken, such as this moment when you are stuffy and a little bit wheezed.
Maybe everything was so new to me when beginning to learn about how keep you living safely with this disease. Mom will surely train to be strong to cope with challenging obstacles ahead that we would pass along together.
My lovely Chou, we will always side by side, please remember that I always beside you follow up each breathing rate, and your sound of breathing. I love you so much, my dearest Chou